I Beseech You, Sign My Guestbook
Stay thee gone fair dreamers,
For AOL is not the place for thee.
And do not wander down our hallways,
If fanciful, or weak of heart ye be.
For here you find your fantasies,
All your dreams come true,
But each dream you find,
Is sure to turn on you.
AOL is no place for poets,
Worthier muses must you find.
For in this world
There are fairer lovers and fairer dreams
The like of which
you cannot find on a computer screen.
For those with still the passion to dream,
Must meet their lovers flesh to flesh,
For there is no romance in an encounter
Through digital interface.
No keystrokes are so divine,
As to make a wanton swoon,
No password so sublime,
To make them love the likes of you.
So fare thee well, dreamers,
Aye, mark me leave this place,
For here your dreams have fangs,
And are liable to bite you back.
Or if fangs be your desire,
Then the fangs recede to
Reveal a wife a child in their past.
This AOL this AOHell, this world of
Allusion.
For here you read your own meaning into,
Every line that's written.
And a scholar if you be,
Someone is sure to damn thee,
For reading too much into
Their surly inhibitions.
So retreat now,
And take thine dreams with thee,
And find a cleaner place.
For mark my words,
There is no such thing as passion
Unless it's seen face to face.
So the phone rang,
And without thinking, I answered it.
Your voice met my ears, and it
Was completely unfamiliar,
Although not unpleasant.
You talked of hours
Spent in conversation,
Of unequaled passion
Shared over the wires,
And I grasped for the spark
Of what you were talking about.
You told me that you knew I'd
One day be famous, for
My words had already
Changed your life.
You told me that I emotionally
And intellectually stimulated
You in ways no other living
Being ever had. You told me
That you meditated on the
Sound of my voice.
God, I hate my voice.
You said you thought I was
The only woman you could
Ever feel as one with.
And you talked about the
Nights we'd spent on the
Phone in steamy conversation.
You lamented the fact that
You hadn't recorded some of them,
Just the mention of that
Brings a flush to my cheeks.
I would never do that sort of thing.
You talked about how you
Wanted to chart the map
Of my mouth with your lips.
You said you wanted to play
Lewis and Clark, and my body
Was to be the Frontier.
You whispered my name over
And over, talking of how you
Loved it so, how just the sound
Of it being spoken aloud
Mesmerized you. You said
You wished you were on the
West coast. Just where the
Hell were you calling from?
You told me that I haunted
Your existence and that you
Couldn't rid you daydreams of
My presence. You said you could
Feel me across the miles, and
I giggled, and said, "Wow, I'm
Glad to know that I have that
Affect on someone." You talked
About my wonderful imagination,
My way with words, and how
You wish you would have recorded
Some of our previous phone
Conversations, because they had
Been more erotic than any sexual
Experience you had ever had.
You told me that you
Wished I was there with you,
And that you could feel my body
Pressed against yours. As you whispered,
"Tell me what you'd do to me,
If you were here right now."
I hung up the phone and tried to
Figure out who the fuck you were,
And what the hell you were talking about!
I Beseech You, Sign My Guestbook
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